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Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) reportedly had priests perform an “exorcism” on her home after her husband Paul was attacked with a hammer by an alleged intruder.
Published: Sunday, January 29th, 2023 @ 1:06 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire representative nancy pelosi priest exorcism husband paul pelosi house speaker |
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Local wife Victoria Crab phoned her husband in the early evening Thursday to see if he could run by the store real quick on his way home from work so he could grab a couple thousand items.
Published: Thursday, January 26th, 2023 @ 9:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband store |
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Local man Jeremy Clams became bedridden Tuesday after a flu virus brutally assaulted his body with a sore throat, coughing, some body aches, and even a mild fever.
Published: Wednesday, January 25th, 2023 @ 9:56 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man husband wife children flu |
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Witnesses reported that the Gerbison household was in an unpleasant state after the dumb oaf of a husband, Gill, assumed he could use the bathroom's hand towels to dry his hands.
Published: Wednesday, January 11th, 2023 @ 12:37 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband hand towel dry |
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Local woman Amber Rhodes suddenly snapped out of a deep, seven-month coma today, at the exact moment her husband booted up his PlayStation.
Published: Wednesday, January 11th, 2023 @ 12:29 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband coma playstation |
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Is your husband cheating on you? We here at the Babylon Bee hate marital infidelity, so we consulted marriage experts to learn all the troubling signs to look for when a man isn't being faithful.
Published: Sunday, December 25th, 2022 @ 3:20 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband cheating wife |
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After years of struggling to purchase his wife the right gift for Christmas, one local man started listening in October for ideas. His attentiveness gave him the idea of buying his wife a new, rechargeable vacuum
Published: Friday, December 23rd, 2022 @ 1:27 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband christmas gift vacuum wife |
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Local husband and useless idiot Virgil Marlo met with disaster Monday after placing throw pillows on the bed in the wrong order. The clueless husband had attempted to tidy up after knocking the pillows on the floor.
Published: Wednesday, December 21st, 2022 @ 11:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband throw pillows |
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A family was brought to the brink of tragedy today as a local woman began making funeral arrangements for her husband when he failed to respond to her text message within 13 seconds.
Published: Friday, December 16th, 2022 @ 12:14 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife funeral arrangements husband text |
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A minimum of 35 pieces of tape is needed to successfully wrap a gift, husband scientists said Monday. The surprise announcement was made by representatives of the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) just in time for the holiday season.
Published: Friday, December 9th, 2022 @ 10:22 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife christmas present |
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Local husband Terry McGerry was seen beaming with confidence as he waited in line at the department store checkout, having picked out the wrong Christmas present for his wife weeks earlier than usual.
Published: Thursday, December 8th, 2022 @ 7:49 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife christmas present |
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A local man found cause for great concern this week when he discovered Amazon was moving forward with plans to build a distribution hub located in his front yard.
Published: Thursday, November 24th, 2022 @ 9:40 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband amazon warehouse |
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After a bruising campaign and a protracted process of tabulating results, local man Mike Vaughan's wife has gained control of the house in a slim but decisive majority of 1 vote per wife and 1 vote per husband.
Published: Tuesday, November 22nd, 2022 @ 9:08 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife house husband majority |
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Multiple sources have confirmed that local man Dan Zilph's Instagram account exists solely to wish his wife "happy birthday" every year.
Published: Thursday, November 17th, 2022 @ 3:04 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband instagram wife birthday |
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According to sources close to local man Greg Bernard, the construction sales representative, husband, and father of five often makes cracks about how emotional and moody his wife is
Published: Friday, November 4th, 2022 @ 1:40 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man husband wife moody sports |
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Local Woman Francine Guacmeister faked another headache after her husband Allen suggested going up to the bedroom for a romantic night of watching the Lord of the Rings Motion Picture Trilogy: Extended Edition.
Published: Friday, October 28th, 2022 @ 3:05 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: babylon bee woman fake headache husband lord of the rings amazon |
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Local man Alex McIlvaine stumbled upon the brilliant idea today of adding a little sign to his cigar humidor that reads "Smokeable essential oils."
Published: Sunday, October 23rd, 2022 @ 3:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband cigar essential oils |
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During a powerful Sunday sermon delivered by her pastor, a local woman has come under deep spiritual conviction that her husband really needs to repent of his sins.
Published: Wednesday, October 19th, 2022 @ 3:39 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: daily wire sunday sermon woman husband repent |
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A local man has achieved the unthinkable and miraculously arrived home on time and in good health despite not having his wife with him in the car to provide constant safe driving instructions.
Published: Friday, October 14th, 2022 @ 8:13 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man husband wife driving |
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Local husband Spencer Johnson has been given a life sentence of going to the pumpkin patch every year with his wife Megan.
Published: Wednesday, October 12th, 2022 @ 7:12 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband pumpkin pumpkin patch |
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Date night for Madilynn and Murphy McMickerson started off just like every other date night when Madilynn told the server she would just have a light salad followed by her husband's entire entree.
Published: Thursday, October 6th, 2022 @ 10:02 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband restaurant entree salad |
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Local man Terrence Bilkerson successfully transitioned into a woman recently after taking his wife's multivitamin. The transition occurred instantly after he grabbed the wrong bottle of vitamins
Published: Thursday, October 6th, 2022 @ 2:08 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man woman husband wife transgender multivitamin |
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Supermodel Gisele Bündchen recently opened up about her husband Tom Brady coming out of retirement and returning to the NFL.
Published: Sunday, October 2nd, 2022 @ 3:21 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire supermodel gisele bündchen tom brady husband return football |
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According to sources, local husband Brad Sanders has completely emptied the dishwasher without any prompting from his wife in hopes that she'll be cool with him watching 19 hours of football this weekend.
Published: Sunday, October 2nd, 2022 @ 2:28 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband man dishwasher football |
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It's a tale that's all too common for marriages these days: things seem to be going great, with love and romance in the air, when suddenly, the husband begins to withdraw.
Published: Saturday, September 24th, 2022 @ 1:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife pictures wwii plane |
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Local woman Sabrina McKenzie asked her husband to please go on an epic quest of mythologic proportions, since he was already up anyways to go to the bathroom.
Published: Wednesday, September 14th, 2022 @ 10:56 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband water feather fire mountain |
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Local man Alex Gleitz began wondering today if he ought to perhaps do the dishes, having found himself eating Honey Nut Cheerios out of a flower vase.
Published: Wednesday, September 14th, 2022 @ 2:55 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband man dishes |
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According to sources, local woman Grace Barton committed to reveal her most recent Target receipt to her husband by noon today, but when she submitted the document, almost every word and line item on the receipt was redacted with a thick black bar.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 11:26 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband target receipt |
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Local wife and mother of three Hannah Baxter was tired of constantly reminding her husband, Brad, to put his socks in the dirty clothes hamper.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 9:41 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife i did that sticker socks husband |
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We at The Babylon Bee want to help de-code common marital communications between the spouses, whether it's helping husbands know whether their wives are mad at them or helping wives to understand the mixed signals, coded messages, and confounding double-speak from the complicated creatures
Published: Sunday, August 21st, 2022 @ 12:26 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife mad |
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Paul Pelosi was slurring his words and smelled strongly of booze after wrecking his Porsche in May, according to a police complaint filed ahead of the House Speaker’s husband’s arraignment Wednesday.
Published: Sunday, August 14th, 2022 @ 10:34 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire nancy pelosi house speaker husband paul pelosi arraignment car |
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This week, Courtney Lindeen presented her husband Aaron with a bold and innovative plan to solve the family's consumer debt burden.
Published: Friday, August 12th, 2022 @ 4:47 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife household debt reduction act |
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After finding herself unnecessarily upset about a thoughtful critique from her husband regarding her shoe collection and a dearth of closet space, dutiful wife Clarissa Zwygart was able to calm down after her husband wisely counseled her to calm down.
Published: Friday, August 5th, 2022 @ 5:33 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband calm |
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A Maryland woman told police that she shot her husband at the Mandarin Oriental hotel in Washington D.C. Thursday because she heard that he had allegedly molested children at the daycare she runs near Baltimore, according to an arrest affidavit filed in a D.C. court.
Published: Friday, August 5th, 2022 @ 4:27 am
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire maryland woman shot husband children daycare molested |
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According to sources, local married couple Keith and Rebecca Powell can't decide what they want to eat for dinner, and have each decided to ask one another what they want for dinner over and over until they both starve.
Published: Thursday, August 4th, 2022 @ 1:14 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife starve death |
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House Speaker Nancy Pelosi could be poised to cash in upcoming legislation meant to bolster the U.S. semiconductor industry, after her husband exercised shares worth as much as $5 million in a California company that stands to reap subsidies.
Published: Friday, July 29th, 2022 @ 12:49 am
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire house speaker nancy pelosi husband paul pelosi stock |
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Husband scientists employed with the Smithsonian Institution have discovered a strange basket holding dirty clothes, and so far are completely baffled by where it came from or what its use could be.
Published: Tuesday, July 12th, 2022 @ 8:52 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee washington dc husband scientist laundry |
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Local husband and father Hank Parsons stopped by the grocery store today on the way home "to pick up a few steaks to ruin for dinner," sources at the Parsons household confirmed.
Published: Saturday, July 9th, 2022 @ 11:16 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband steak dinner |
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The director of Texas’ Department of Public Safety revealed this week that the police officer husband of a slain Robb Elementary School teacher was detained and disarmed when he tried to enter the school to save his wife.
Published: Sunday, July 3rd, 2022 @ 6:22 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire police officer husband uvalde teacher school shooting texas |
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Local law enforcement officials in California have released the mugshot of House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s (D-CA) husband, Paul Pelosi, from his DUI arrest late last month.
Published: Wednesday, June 15th, 2022 @ 7:10 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire mugshot nancy pelosi house speaker husband |
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The Meebleton family was enjoying their Sunday morning tradition of burning pancakes and spilling the syrup when husband, Ron, did his part to get the family ready for church by shouting, "Kids, it's time to get ready for church!"
Published: Saturday, June 11th, 2022 @ 11:57 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband children church |
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Local husband Justin Buble was "totally blindsided" by an event his wife only told him about every day for the past month, sources at the Buble household confirmed this afternoon.
Published: Wednesday, June 8th, 2022 @ 11:02 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife |