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The American public at large has noticed an eerie calm in recent days, leading everyone to believe the slow news week must be a clear indication the reptile overlords who rule the globe must be planning something big.
The American public at large has noticed an eerie calm in recent days, leading everyone to believe the slow news week must be a clear indication the reptile overlords who rule the globe must be planning something big.
 
A local lizard man spoke with reporters to provide a detailed account of a shameful incident of outright harassment he suffered on an airplane while trying to travel from Dallas to Orlando, Florida.
A local lizard man spoke with reporters to provide a detailed account of a shameful incident of outright harassment he suffered on an airplane while trying to travel from Dallas to Orlando, Florida.
 
Politicians in Washington are growing increasingly nervous, as the CDC has announced they have discovered the first case of Lizardpox on American shores.
Politicians in Washington are growing increasingly nervous, as the CDC has announced they have discovered the first case of Lizardpox on American shores.
 
Zookeepers across the nation are reportedly scrambling to vaccinate all reptiles in captivity following the announcement that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has tested positive for COVID-19.
Zookeepers across the nation are reportedly scrambling to vaccinate all reptiles in captivity following the announcement that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has tested positive for COVID-19.
 
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