Streets Overrun With Thugs Wearing Summer Line Of Lululemon Attire

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Under the cover of Covid, and now in the shadow of the infamous Election Irregularities of that fated 2020 presidential election, with current emerging alleged election fraud in Nevada and Pennsylvania inconveniently slipping into the public discourse, there is proved a colluded ongoing Election Interference in the nomination of the Republican candidate, the likes of which has never occurred in our Constitutional Republic's history, albeit, the question remains: Do you support the plain-sight Election Interference of the Democratic Socialist party, employing its minions in their Propagandistic Media, and their Two Tiered Justice System?

98.88% No, I do not support Election Interference; I am a patriot unto our Constitution.

1.12% Yes, I do support Election Interference; the alternative, Donald Trump, to this mentally diminished president is far worse.

0% "What, me worry" if elections are rigged?

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Streets Overrun With Thugs Wearing Summer Line Of Lululemon Attire

Published: Thursday, July 20th, 2023 @ 5:44 pm
By: Babylon Bee ( More Entries )

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    ATLANTA, GA     Following Lululemon's surprising decision to not intervene when merchandise is being stolen, streets have been overrun with groups of thugs wearing the latest Lululemon attire.

    "Did those guys just run by in matching pairs of cool-tone athletic training joggers from Lululemon's 2023 summer collection?" asked Sarah Jenkins as she was passed by thugs firing shots wildly in the air. "Criminals have such fashionable taste in the latest athletic wear trends!"

    According to local police, Lululemon's decision to allow shoplifters to run free has caused serious difficulties. "Criminals are so much faster now! We literally can not keep up with clothing that offers that level of agility and breathability while sprinting full speed away from law enforcement," said Officer Dan Peterson. "What hope do we have against such superior performance?"

    "I never thought I'd be mugged by someone wearing Lululemon's latest moisture-wicking tank top," expressed local man Dave Simmons. "Now I don't know what to do when I see a group of people wearing yoga pants. Am I in danger or are they just heading to grab a latte or to a workout?"

    At publishing time, Lululemon had announced that they would start calling the cops on shoplifters, but only if the suspects are white.

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