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Eight months after an Illinois woman reported her husband missing, she found him dead in their home.
Published: Thursday, March 23rd, 2023 @ 1:21 am
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire woman husband dead body illinois |
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Kid Rock got everyone’s attention on Monday when he shared news on his Instagram that he will be headlining several concerts this summer as part of his “No Snowflakes Summer Concerts.”
Published: Tuesday, March 14th, 2023 @ 1:08 am
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire kid rock band snowflakes summer concert |
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Despite having faithfully shepherded his congregation for twelve years, local Pastor Reagan Johnson has been removed from his post after a concerned congregant notified the elder board of his failing to have "Husband. Father. Pastor." in his bio on Twitter.
Published: Friday, February 10th, 2023 @ 11:14 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee pastor husband father twitter |
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Local man Brad Johnson has joined Faith Covenant's worship band, giving it the token forty-something balding guy it was sorely missing.
Published: Friday, February 10th, 2023 @ 10:09 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee worship band |
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In order to make the transition from singing to preaching more seamless, Grace Community Church has installed a trap door that the praise band will fall through as soon as they finish their worship set.
Published: Saturday, February 4th, 2023 @ 8:52 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee chuch trap door band |
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Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) reportedly had priests perform an “exorcism” on her home after her husband Paul was attacked with a hammer by an alleged intruder.
Published: Sunday, January 29th, 2023 @ 1:06 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire representative nancy pelosi priest exorcism husband paul pelosi house speaker |
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Local wife Victoria Crab phoned her husband in the early evening Thursday to see if he could run by the store real quick on his way home from work so he could grab a couple thousand items.
Published: Thursday, January 26th, 2023 @ 9:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband store |
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Local man Jeremy Clams became bedridden Tuesday after a flu virus brutally assaulted his body with a sore throat, coughing, some body aches, and even a mild fever.
Published: Wednesday, January 25th, 2023 @ 9:56 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man husband wife children flu |
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Witnesses reported that the Gerbison household was in an unpleasant state after the dumb oaf of a husband, Gill, assumed he could use the bathroom's hand towels to dry his hands.
Published: Wednesday, January 11th, 2023 @ 12:37 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband hand towel dry |
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Local woman Amber Rhodes suddenly snapped out of a deep, seven-month coma today, at the exact moment her husband booted up his PlayStation.
Published: Wednesday, January 11th, 2023 @ 12:29 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband coma playstation |
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Is your husband cheating on you? We here at the Babylon Bee hate marital infidelity, so we consulted marriage experts to learn all the troubling signs to look for when a man isn't being faithful.
Published: Sunday, December 25th, 2022 @ 3:20 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband cheating wife |
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After years of struggling to purchase his wife the right gift for Christmas, one local man started listening in October for ideas. His attentiveness gave him the idea of buying his wife a new, rechargeable vacuum
Published: Friday, December 23rd, 2022 @ 1:27 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband christmas gift vacuum wife |
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Local husband and useless idiot Virgil Marlo met with disaster Monday after placing throw pillows on the bed in the wrong order. The clueless husband had attempted to tidy up after knocking the pillows on the floor.
Published: Wednesday, December 21st, 2022 @ 11:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband throw pillows |
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The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band has always been a favorite of mine in the way that they have always moved at their own pace in their own time.
Published: Wednesday, December 21st, 2022 @ 8:02 am
By: Stan Deatherage
Search Terms: christmas carols nitty gritty dirt band in the christmas spirit chrstms beaufort county |
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A family was brought to the brink of tragedy today as a local woman began making funeral arrangements for her husband when he failed to respond to her text message within 13 seconds.
Published: Friday, December 16th, 2022 @ 12:14 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife funeral arrangements husband text |
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The local worship band for Redeemer Church has continued its decade-long shadow ban on bass player Kevin Young.
Published: Tuesday, December 13th, 2022 @ 1:07 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee worship band ban bassist |
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A minimum of 35 pieces of tape is needed to successfully wrap a gift, husband scientists said Monday. The surprise announcement was made by representatives of the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) just in time for the holiday season.
Published: Friday, December 9th, 2022 @ 10:22 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife christmas present |
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Local husband Terry McGerry was seen beaming with confidence as he waited in line at the department store checkout, having picked out the wrong Christmas present for his wife weeks earlier than usual.
Published: Thursday, December 8th, 2022 @ 7:49 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife christmas present |
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A local man found cause for great concern this week when he discovered Amazon was moving forward with plans to build a distribution hub located in his front yard.
Published: Thursday, November 24th, 2022 @ 9:40 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband amazon warehouse |
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After a bruising campaign and a protracted process of tabulating results, local man Mike Vaughan's wife has gained control of the house in a slim but decisive majority of 1 vote per wife and 1 vote per husband.
Published: Tuesday, November 22nd, 2022 @ 9:08 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife house husband majority |
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Multiple sources have confirmed that local man Dan Zilph's Instagram account exists solely to wish his wife "happy birthday" every year.
Published: Thursday, November 17th, 2022 @ 3:04 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband instagram wife birthday |
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According to sources close to local man Greg Bernard, the construction sales representative, husband, and father of five often makes cracks about how emotional and moody his wife is
Published: Friday, November 4th, 2022 @ 1:40 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man husband wife moody sports |
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Local Woman Francine Guacmeister faked another headache after her husband Allen suggested going up to the bedroom for a romantic night of watching the Lord of the Rings Motion Picture Trilogy: Extended Edition.
Published: Friday, October 28th, 2022 @ 3:05 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: babylon bee woman fake headache husband lord of the rings amazon |
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Local man Alex McIlvaine stumbled upon the brilliant idea today of adding a little sign to his cigar humidor that reads "Smokeable essential oils."
Published: Sunday, October 23rd, 2022 @ 3:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband cigar essential oils |
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During a powerful Sunday sermon delivered by her pastor, a local woman has come under deep spiritual conviction that her husband really needs to repent of his sins.
Published: Wednesday, October 19th, 2022 @ 3:39 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: daily wire sunday sermon woman husband repent |
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A local man has achieved the unthinkable and miraculously arrived home on time and in good health despite not having his wife with him in the car to provide constant safe driving instructions.
Published: Friday, October 14th, 2022 @ 8:13 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man husband wife driving |
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Local husband Spencer Johnson has been given a life sentence of going to the pumpkin patch every year with his wife Megan.
Published: Wednesday, October 12th, 2022 @ 7:12 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband pumpkin pumpkin patch |
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Date night for Madilynn and Murphy McMickerson started off just like every other date night when Madilynn told the server she would just have a light salad followed by her husband's entire entree.
Published: Thursday, October 6th, 2022 @ 10:02 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband restaurant entree salad |
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Local man Terrence Bilkerson successfully transitioned into a woman recently after taking his wife's multivitamin. The transition occurred instantly after he grabbed the wrong bottle of vitamins
Published: Thursday, October 6th, 2022 @ 2:08 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee man woman husband wife transgender multivitamin |
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Supermodel Gisele Bündchen recently opened up about her husband Tom Brady coming out of retirement and returning to the NFL.
Published: Sunday, October 2nd, 2022 @ 3:21 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire supermodel gisele bündchen tom brady husband return football |
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According to sources, local husband Brad Sanders has completely emptied the dishwasher without any prompting from his wife in hopes that she'll be cool with him watching 19 hours of football this weekend.
Published: Sunday, October 2nd, 2022 @ 2:28 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband man dishwasher football |
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It's a tale that's all too common for marriages these days: things seem to be going great, with love and romance in the air, when suddenly, the husband begins to withdraw.
Published: Saturday, September 24th, 2022 @ 1:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife pictures wwii plane |
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Local woman Sabrina McKenzie asked her husband to please go on an epic quest of mythologic proportions, since he was already up anyways to go to the bathroom.
Published: Wednesday, September 14th, 2022 @ 10:56 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband water feather fire mountain |
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Local man Alex Gleitz began wondering today if he ought to perhaps do the dishes, having found himself eating Honey Nut Cheerios out of a flower vase.
Published: Wednesday, September 14th, 2022 @ 2:55 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband man dishes |
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According to sources, local woman Grace Barton committed to reveal her most recent Target receipt to her husband by noon today, but when she submitted the document, almost every word and line item on the receipt was redacted with a thick black bar.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 11:26 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband target receipt |
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Local wife and mother of three Hannah Baxter was tired of constantly reminding her husband, Brad, to put his socks in the dirty clothes hamper.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 9:41 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife i did that sticker socks husband |
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An alternative Christian band, Indie Recording Artists Fernando Rivera and Tiffany Elaine, "Fern and Tiff", based in North Carolina are on a mission to bring their compelling lyrics and soulful journeys to the music stage.
Published: Tuesday, August 30th, 2022 @ 9:14 pm
By: Eden Gordon Hill
Search Terms: fern and tiff alternative christian band fade away healing jesus |
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We at The Babylon Bee want to help de-code common marital communications between the spouses, whether it's helping husbands know whether their wives are mad at them or helping wives to understand the mixed signals, coded messages, and confounding double-speak from the complicated creatures
Published: Sunday, August 21st, 2022 @ 12:26 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife mad |
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Paul Pelosi was slurring his words and smelled strongly of booze after wrecking his Porsche in May, according to a police complaint filed ahead of the House Speaker’s husband’s arraignment Wednesday.
Published: Sunday, August 14th, 2022 @ 10:34 pm
By: Daily Wire
Search Terms: daily wire nancy pelosi house speaker husband paul pelosi arraignment car |
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This week, Courtney Lindeen presented her husband Aaron with a bold and innovative plan to solve the family's consumer debt burden.
Published: Friday, August 12th, 2022 @ 4:47 pm
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee husband wife household debt reduction act |
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After finding herself unnecessarily upset about a thoughtful critique from her husband regarding her shoe collection and a dearth of closet space, dutiful wife Clarissa Zwygart was able to calm down after her husband wisely counseled her to calm down.
Published: Friday, August 5th, 2022 @ 5:33 am
By: Babylon Bee
Search Terms: babylon bee wife husband calm |