4D Space Chess: Elon Musk Switches Back To Democratic Party, Harrassment Accusations Immediately Withdrawn | Eastern NC Now

Talk about a 4D space chess move: Elon Musk has just announced he is returning to the Democratic Party just days after he moved over to the Republican Party.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    STARBASE, TX     Talk about a 4D space chess move: Elon Musk has just announced he is returning to the Democratic Party just days after he moved over to the Republican Party. As soon as he made the switch back to the liberal political party, the sexual harassment allegation published by the media was withdrawn, the accuser apologized, and Musk was granted $30 million in reparations for the "false and damaging" claim against the "wonderful humanitarian and champion of the Democratic cause."

    Clever. Genius. An impeccable move! Musk said he came up with the idea after watching the accusations come out against Brett Kavanaugh and realized he could simply switch parties back to get rid of the negative press coverage.

    "Elon Musk clearly did this terrible thing because he's now a member of the political party opposite me," said one CNN anchor. "Wait a minute -- breaking news! It appears Elon Musk has switched back to the Democratic Party. Coming up after the break, we dive into the old tweets of the accuser and explain why she may be a Nazi."

    "Plus, we air a special report on how you should only believe some women, replacing the previously announced segment on how you need to believe all women."

    A special investigative report also backed up Musk's strategy, finding that switching to the Republican Party increased one's chances of an old sexual harassment allegation getting suddenly published in every major newspaper on the planet.

    At publishing time, Musk had switched to the Libertarian party so that everyone would just ignore him and roll their eyes while he smokes weed and rants about Bitcoin.
Go Back

HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

Beaufort County residents deserve lower taxes and should demand them from government.
Cheryl Hines. Dennis Quaid. Nicki Minaj. All became associated with the Trump administration. What happened next?
"Pay no attention to the folks behind the curtain" was their preference but things are beginning to come to light.
Understanding how parties work is important for making informed decisions regarding elected officials.

HbAD1

Two years ago, new media brought President Trump back to the White House. What happened?
Victims’ advocates, prosecutors, law enforcement officials, and families impacted by violent crime gathered Tuesday at the North Carolina State Archives building in Raleigh to recognize National Crime Victims’ Rights Week and honor those affected by crime across North Carolina.
The POLITICO poll found that almost half of respondents think Hollywood players should "be less vocal with their political beliefs."
Provincial governments in Alberta and Saskatchewan refuse to cooperate with federal gov.t

HbAD2

"They help cultivate a radical hate America agenda, and we can't afford that same toxic ideology in America's War Department.”
The attack comes amid a heightened concern over terror attacks after President Donald Trump launched "Operation Epic Fury" in Iran.

HbAD3

 
 
Back to Top