Panic Erupts On Delta Flight As Captain Of Female Crew Announces That 'Everything's Fine' | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    U.S.     A scene of desperation and panic unfolded on a Delta Airlines flight after the captain of the all-female flight crew announced over the intercom that everything was fine.

    "Sure, just go on doing whatever you want back there. It's fine," said Captain Savannah Ross with a sigh. "Why wouldn't it be fine?"

    The cabin immediately broke into a cacophony of shrieks and prayers, with passengers desperately trying to message loved ones to say goodbye. "We keep asking, but they won't say what's wrong," said Danny Evans, who had managed to reach his wife's phone. "Whatever it is, it must be really bad. We're in trouble, babe."

    Passengers continued begging the crew to know what was the matter, but were met with the silent treatment. At last, the Captain returned to the intercom only to say, "You wouldn't understand" - setting off a fresh wave of hysteria.