8 Ways To Spot A Christian On A College Campus | Eastern NC Now

During Roman times, spotting a Christian could be as easy as walking down to the Colosseum to see who was being eaten by a lion. These days, Christians can blend in a little easier - but especially on college campuses, there are always telltale signs.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on Eastern NC NOW with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    During Roman times, spotting a Christian could be as easy as walking down to the Colosseum to see who was being eaten by a lion. These days, Christians can blend in a little easier - but especially on college campuses, there are always telltale signs.

    Here are eight simple ways to spot a Christian on a college campus:

  1. They're wearing a dress and they're actually a woman: This makes them really stand out from all the bearded, dress-wearing dudes on campus.
  2. They use a ping pong table to play ping pong: Why? What do you heathens use it for?
  3. They defeat their atheist philosophy professor in a debate over God's existence, causing the class to stand up and declare 'God's not dead': Someone should totally make a movie about this. Or a song, even.
  4. Have a side hustle in the football tailgate area stacking folding chairs: It's almost as if they've spent hundreds of hours doing it growing up.
  5. Carry around their own French press coffee maker everywhere they go: Nobody, and we mean nobody, knows coffee like a Christian college kid.
  6. They haven't screamed "Death to Israel!" even one time: Reluctance to cheer for genocide is a dead giveaway.
  7. They have chickens and a garden plot in their dorm: This is also referred to as a "trad-student."
  8. Walk around wearing a "Cru" shirt and ask if people have a moment to take a survey about religious worldviews: Hint: it's not just a survey!

    When you use the list above as a guide, they stick out like sore thumbs. Now get out there on your local college campus and start spotting those Christians!
Go Back


Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published )
Enter Your Comment ( text only please )




McConnell Dresses As Prostitute To Lure Hunter Into Closed-Door Hearing Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Give yourself for Christmas


HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

“Not getting that large sum of money ... was just the final death blow to the company.”
illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic

HbAD1

fortunately this travesty has not yet come to Beaufort County, but it has in Virginia
now Fauci should be indicted for his previous lies under oath to Congress
Queen Garris has made a post on the Beaufort County GOP site that you should read. It is disloyal to conservative candiates key in the following: https://www.Facebook.Com/beaufortcountygop
another reason we need the SAVE America Act that Democrat politicians fear

HbAD2

Throughout the evening, the fireworks and other program events competed with uncooperative weather.
spending spree came from deceptively named "Inflation Reduction Act"
follows up on mass anti-immigration riots in Belfast, Northern Ireland

HbAD3

 
 
Back to Top