Somebody's Laughing | Eastern NC Now

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Somebody's Laughing  

You may think this is not funny, I may, on occasion, think it's not funny, but somebody, somewhere is laughing.

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With Ketanji Brown Jackson joining a growing number of women on the United States Supreme Court, Justice Clarance Thomas has taken to wearing noise-canceling headphones to help drown out the incessant chatter.
With Ketanji Brown Jackson joining a growing number of women on the United States Supreme Court, Justice Clarance Thomas has taken to wearing noise-canceling headphones to help drown out the incessant chatter.
 
Quarterback Tom Brady is growing increasingly frustrated with his offensive line after they once again failed to protect him in a brutal loss to the Steelers.
Quarterback Tom Brady is growing increasingly frustrated with his offensive line after they once again failed to protect him in a brutal loss to the Steelers.
 
In a recent interview with CNN's Jake Tapper, President Biden sat down to assure the nation that while a nuclear war is likely on the way, it will only be "very slight."
In a recent interview with CNN's Jake Tapper, President Biden sat down to assure the nation that while a nuclear war is likely on the way, it will only be "very slight."
 
Last week, PayPal faced backlash after including verbiage in its Acceptable Use Policy that allowed the company to fine users $2,500 for "misinformation."
Last week, PayPal faced backlash after including verbiage in its Acceptable Use Policy that allowed the company to fine users $2,500 for "misinformation."
 
Aides are scrambling to keep the President on track without wandering off stage and getting lost again on national television. To combat this, Biden's handlers have resorted to laying down a trail of women's hair on the ground for Biden to sniff and follow.
Aides are scrambling to keep the President on track without wandering off stage and getting lost again on national television. To combat this, Biden's handlers have resorted to laying down a trail of women's hair on the ground for Biden to sniff and follow.
 
Senator Mitt Romney reassured supporters today that he would be remaining a faithful member of the Democratic Party.
Senator Mitt Romney reassured supporters today that he would be remaining a faithful member of the Democratic Party.
 
Sporting a purple pin-striped suit and top hat while twirling a cane whimsically, President Biden announced today that he has hidden five golden crack pipes among the millions of taxpayer-funded safe smoking kits.
Sporting a purple pin-striped suit and top hat while twirling a cane whimsically, President Biden announced today that he has hidden five golden crack pipes among the millions of taxpayer-funded safe smoking kits.
 
A potentially disastrous situation was averted yesterday as White House aides were able to grab President Biden's arm in the nick of time and lead him away just as he was beginning to "follow the light."
A potentially disastrous situation was averted yesterday as White House aides were able to grab President Biden's arm in the nick of time and lead him away just as he was beginning to "follow the light."
 
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi drafted articles of impeachment against newly elected Italian Prime Minister Giorgia Meloni Tuesday to combat what she calls "far-right extremist Mussolini cosplay under the Tuscan sun."
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi drafted articles of impeachment against newly elected Italian Prime Minister Giorgia Meloni Tuesday to combat what she calls "far-right extremist Mussolini cosplay under the Tuscan sun."
 
The top-secret military base Area 51 is being overrun by curious visitors this morning after former president Trump announced he had declassified the installation in his mind several years ago.
The top-secret military base Area 51 is being overrun by curious visitors this morning after former president Trump announced he had declassified the installation in his mind several years ago.
 
A local couple is in shock today after a startling visit from Rightful Georgia Governor® Stacey Abrams. According to sources, the couple was listening to the heartbeat of their child on a sonogram for the very first time when Abrams burst through the wall like the Kool-Aid man
A local couple is in shock today after a startling visit from Rightful Georgia Governor® Stacey Abrams. According to sources, the couple was listening to the heartbeat of their child on a sonogram for the very first time when Abrams burst through the wall like the Kool-Aid man
 
Amid a storm of controversy over recent antisemitic comments and remarks praising Hitler, Ye West has announced the release of his brand-new album My Struggle.
Amid a storm of controversy over recent antisemitic comments and remarks praising Hitler, Ye West has announced the release of his brand-new album My Struggle.
 
Wondering why people actually still vote for Democrats? Believe it or not, there are still Democrat voters out there and we've compiled their top reasons for doing so!
Wondering why people actually still vote for Democrats? Believe it or not, there are still Democrat voters out there and we've compiled their top reasons for doing so!
 
Things got tense in the White House briefing room today after several journalists in the press pool asked Jean-Pierre to answer some questions.
Things got tense in the White House briefing room today after several journalists in the press pool asked Jean-Pierre to answer some questions.
 
Since her involuntary retirement from her lucrative gig as Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi has been seen lingering on the street corners of the National Mall with a cardboard sign that says "Will trade stock tips 4 food."
Since her involuntary retirement from her lucrative gig as Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi has been seen lingering on the street corners of the National Mall with a cardboard sign that says "Will trade stock tips 4 food."
 
Trump is going to be president again! No, really! And when he takes office he's going to make America great and glorious again.
Trump is going to be president again! No, really! And when he takes office he's going to make America great and glorious again.
 
Senator-elect John Fetterman has finally realized the American dream by living with his parents until at least the age of 50 before smoothly transitioning into a cushy government job.
Senator-elect John Fetterman has finally realized the American dream by living with his parents until at least the age of 50 before smoothly transitioning into a cushy government job.
 
New Twitter CEO Elon Musk, in a bold and forceful statement against sharing harmful disinformation, has suspended one of the largest purveyors of fake news on the entire social network: The New York Times.
New Twitter CEO Elon Musk, in a bold and forceful statement against sharing harmful disinformation, has suspended one of the largest purveyors of fake news on the entire social network: The New York Times.
 
Amid shocking leaks that showed the Department of Homeland Security colluded with tech companies to suppress speech they disagreed with, Secretary of Homeland Security Alejandro Mayorkas has doubled down
Amid shocking leaks that showed the Department of Homeland Security colluded with tech companies to suppress speech they disagreed with, Secretary of Homeland Security Alejandro Mayorkas has doubled down
 
Georgia gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams made headlines this week by saying women can offset the cost of children by aborting them.
Georgia gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams made headlines this week by saying women can offset the cost of children by aborting them.
 
The world has never been closer to the brink of total nuclear annihilation, according to President Joe Biden's comments at a press conference in between strategy sessions to continue waging his proxy war with nuclear-armed Russia.
The world has never been closer to the brink of total nuclear annihilation, according to President Joe Biden's comments at a press conference in between strategy sessions to continue waging his proxy war with nuclear-armed Russia.
 
Vice President Kamala Harris had a rare moment of candor with the media today about why she's so terrible at talking.
Vice President Kamala Harris had a rare moment of candor with the media today about why she's so terrible at talking.
 
The U.S. Air Force has continued its initiative for a more inclusive, and gender-neutral military by removing all flight sticks from their planes — effective immediately.
The U.S. Air Force has continued its initiative for a more inclusive, and gender-neutral military by removing all flight sticks from their planes — effective immediately.
 
Rightful Governor of Georgia Stacey Abrams announced that she will succeed Elizabeth II as the Queen of England only moments after the announcement of the Queen's death.
Rightful Governor of Georgia Stacey Abrams announced that she will succeed Elizabeth II as the Queen of England only moments after the announcement of the Queen's death.
 
Upon hearing that Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is sending another group of migrants to his mansion in Delaware, President Joe Biden authorized a mobilization of 20,000 National Guard troops to defend his home from the invaders.
Upon hearing that Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is sending another group of migrants to his mansion in Delaware, President Joe Biden authorized a mobilization of 20,000 National Guard troops to defend his home from the invaders.
 
The situation of migrants being transported throughout the United States escalated even further today as Vice President Kamala Harris spoke to the media and officially declared a crisis at the border surrounding her residence in Washington, D.C.
The situation of migrants being transported throughout the United States escalated even further today as Vice President Kamala Harris spoke to the media and officially declared a crisis at the border surrounding her residence in Washington, D.C.
 
After two days of dealing with the insufferable busybodies at the Martha's Vineyard Home Owners Association, illegal immigrants have decided to go back home and take their chances with the cartels.
After two days of dealing with the insufferable busybodies at the Martha's Vineyard Home Owners Association, illegal immigrants have decided to go back home and take their chances with the cartels.
 
In the wake of the arrival of scores of migrants on the island, Barack & Michelle Obama gave orders to their staff to immediately begin construction of new cages to house the influx of foreign nationals at their luxurious Matha's Vineyard estate.
In the wake of the arrival of scores of migrants on the island, Barack & Michelle Obama gave orders to their staff to immediately begin construction of new cages to house the influx of foreign nationals at their luxurious Matha's Vineyard estate.
 
Residents of upscale Martha's Vineyard are in a panic after several buses dropped off illegal immigrants from Florida this week.
Residents of upscale Martha's Vineyard are in a panic after several buses dropped off illegal immigrants from Florida this week.
 
White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre was thrown for a loop Wednesday when a journalist from NBC asked her an actual question. Jean-Pierre, who had a binder full of notes about various subjects, became flustered when she had to consult it.
White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre was thrown for a loop Wednesday when a journalist from NBC asked her an actual question. Jean-Pierre, who had a binder full of notes about various subjects, became flustered when she had to consult it.
 
Jen Psaki has started her first day at a completely new job where she will be doing the exact same thing she's always done by acting as a mouthpiece for the Biden Administration.
Jen Psaki has started her first day at a completely new job where she will be doing the exact same thing she's always done by acting as a mouthpiece for the Biden Administration.
 
With inflation and consumer prices continuing to skyrocket, Democrats in Congress have proposed a brand new Inflation Reduction Act to combat the inflation brought about by the first Inflation Reduction Act.
With inflation and consumer prices continuing to skyrocket, Democrats in Congress have proposed a brand new Inflation Reduction Act to combat the inflation brought about by the first Inflation Reduction Act.
 
After weeks of unsuccessfully stoking Trump supporters towards violent action, the FBI has changed course, beginning internal discussions for executing a MAGA-style attack using FBI resources.
After weeks of unsuccessfully stoking Trump supporters towards violent action, the FBI has changed course, beginning internal discussions for executing a MAGA-style attack using FBI resources.
 
Vice President and Border Czar Kamala Harris announced this week that the southern border is "completely secure." According to sources, she made the announcement while crowd-surfing on a massive caravan of migrants.
Vice President and Border Czar Kamala Harris announced this week that the southern border is "completely secure." According to sources, she made the announcement while crowd-surfing on a massive caravan of migrants.
 
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