As part of a limited-time offer to cash-strapped customers, fast-food giant McDonald's is now offering 36-month, 0% interest financing on all value menu items.
Published: Friday, December 22nd, 2023 @ 11:04 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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An expert panel of sociologists has weighed in on the decline of Western civilization, and they believe they've found the exact moment that our society began to crumble:
Published: Thursday, October 12th, 2023 @ 10:13 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The United States Secret Service concluded its investigation into the theft of hamburgers owned by notable clowned man Ronald McDonald after a full-scale search turned up no sign of the missing burger sack or a viable suspect.
Published: Tuesday, September 19th, 2023 @ 8:56 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The Biden administration will officially be supplying the toys for McDonald's new "Adult Happy Meals", which will reportedly consist of crack pipes and safe smoking kits.
Published: Tuesday, October 18th, 2022 @ 9:22 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The man who made headlines earlier this week for brandishing an axe at a Lower East Side McDonald’s is speaking out, claiming he’s “not unhinged” and insisting 18 hours in jail was ample punishment for his crime.
Published: Friday, October 14th, 2022 @ 12:55 pm
By: Daily Wire
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After hearing another cry to the Almighty over a broken McDonald's ice cream machine, the Lord sent an angel to reassure believers that in Christ's Kingdom the machines will at least work the majority of the time.
Published: Saturday, August 20th, 2022 @ 7:11 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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With the price of food skyrocketing and the value of Bitcoin plummeting, McDonald's restaurants across the world have rolled out a new value menu in which all items cost only 1 Bitcoin.
Published: Sunday, June 26th, 2022 @ 12:01 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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According to sources, Starbucks engineers have almost perfected a cup of coffee half as good as the one at McDonald's. If achieved, Starbucks sales are expected to increase by over 1%.
Published: Friday, June 24th, 2022 @ 12:17 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The state of Washington has the highest minimum wage in the country at $9.32 an hour. Consequently, the state has the third highest teenage unemployment rate in the country at 30.6 percent. This is almost 10 percentage points higher than the national average of about 21 percent.
Published: Friday, June 13th, 2014 @ 9:01 pm
By: John Locke Foundation
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William and Deborah Holder own the Knightdale McDonald's, pictured here. U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder, William's brother, visited the restaurant and interacted with staff and patrons several months ago.
Published: Tuesday, October 9th, 2012 @ 6:23 am
By: John Locke Foundation
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