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A semi-serious investigation.
Published: Friday, January 2nd, 2026 @ 12:44 am
By: Daily Wire
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U.S. — A dorky journalist experienced the thrill of a lifetime this past week, having finally been included for the first time ever in a group text.
Published: Tuesday, July 1st, 2025 @ 9:51 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Fox News has scored exclusive TV rights for what many are already calling the debate of the century. The political bloodbath will pit Gavin Newsom, governor of the state people are fleeing from in terror, against Ron DeSantis, governor of the state people are fleeing to.
Published: Saturday, September 30th, 2023 @ 12:03 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Being cool is a state of mind, but you also need to know what you're doing so you don't end up looking like a total dork. Take smoking a cigar for example. If done correctly, you're the coolest guy in the room, but if you don't pull it off, everyone will think you're a loser.
Published: Tuesday, July 18th, 2023 @ 9:35 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Mr. Oscar Jarvis “Doc” Webster, age 82, a resident of Waters Road, Pinetown, died Thursday, March 2, 2023 at ECU Health Medical Center in Greenville.
Published: Monday, March 6th, 2023 @ 9:16 am
By: Announcements
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According to several reports, everyone from your Jr. High class still thinks about that one time you forgot to zip up your fly, and they laugh about it every single day.
Published: Thursday, January 26th, 2023 @ 1:05 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Parents were called after an incident at Rosa Parks MLK Harvey Milk Elementary today in which several bullies stuffed 3rd-grader Lance Biggens into a locker after the student refused to give them his pronouns.
Published: Tuesday, January 17th, 2023 @ 11:22 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In a not-so-well-known miracle, Jesus the Son of God has done the impossible and healed a totally lame man by giving him a sick wardrobe makeover, curing him instantly.
Published: Sunday, January 15th, 2023 @ 12:38 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Sources are reporting that local man Verp Winston, who was mocked by friends for raising chickens in his backyard, is having the last laugh as egg prices have skyrocketed across the country.
Published: Sunday, January 15th, 2023 @ 9:04 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Hey gang, get a load of this absolute dweeb of a human who didn't bring money for the Book Fair!
Published: Thursday, October 20th, 2022 @ 11:49 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Ilhan Omar was arrested by Capitol Police at an abortion rally yesterday. According to sources, she has used her prison phone call to contact both her husband and her brother.
Published: Saturday, July 23rd, 2022 @ 12:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
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You're a worship leader, which means you have the most important job in the entire church. Don't screw it up, or the whole church service will be ruined and everyone will drive home after the service talking about how "cringe" you were. No pressure!
Published: Saturday, June 25th, 2022 @ 10:48 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Ted Budd for US Senate filed the 2022 Q1 FEC report today indicating that his campaign raised $1,125,369.85 in Q1 this year
Published: Wednesday, April 20th, 2022 @ 2:32 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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Ted Budd Raises $968,360.18 in Q4. Ted Budd Outraises the HMS McCrory by $220,000
Published: Tuesday, February 1st, 2022 @ 10:40 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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Russia has witnessed massive changes over the past two decades. Not all of them have been good. Yuri Maltsev, professor of economics at Carthage College, served as a top economics adviser to Mikhail Gorbachev, the last leader of the former Soviet Union, before Maltsev defected to the United...
Published: Tuesday, September 24th, 2013 @ 4:34 pm
By: John Locke Foundation
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