A local couple capped off a lovely evening together at an Italian restaurant by having their waitress provide them with a to-go box so they can make sure the inside of their car will smell like chicken parmesan for the next three weeks.
Published: Thursday, December 7th, 2023 @ 9:26 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In an attempt to avoid further injury and traumatic incidents involving Caucasians eating food that's far too spicy for them, the scientists behind the Scoville Scale have announced they are releasing a separate spiciness scale for white people.
Published: Friday, September 22nd, 2023 @ 4:54 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Two out of three U.S. voters have declared that President Joe Biden, 80, might be just a tad too mature to run in 2024. Americans think it’s high time he step aside and let younger Democrats fight it out for the nomination, according to a new poll.
Published: Saturday, August 12th, 2023 @ 12:48 pm
By: Daily Wire
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A pro-transgender education group is featuring a transgender activist with a history of making obscene sexual remarks as the keynote speaker for an upcoming conference for those who teach and counsel children.
Published: Saturday, July 8th, 2023 @ 6:34 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Sources in Hades have announced that Satan will finally be opening the underworld's first Chick-fil-A franchise, but it will only serve cauliflower sandwiches.
Published: Wednesday, February 15th, 2023 @ 1:27 am
By: Babylon Bee
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FDA officials specializing in the field of genuine Mexican food have released a comprehensive, peer-reviewed report confirming no link between eating Taco Bell and immediately suffering from explosive diarrhea, and that Taco Bell was "safe and effective."
Published: Monday, February 13th, 2023 @ 6:55 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Being alive is hard. If you don't eat, you die. But, if you eat the wrong thing, you also die. So be careful out there, friends. What you're eating might be literally killing you!
Published: Saturday, January 21st, 2023 @ 1:09 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Kirk Cameron celebrated after libraries that had refused to host him over his new faith-based children’s book reversed course, and he said it should send a message to Christians and conservatives “to be brave.”
Published: Sunday, December 25th, 2022 @ 10:16 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Not all heroes wear capes, but lots of them wear red polos and goofy-looking yellow suspenders. Here we have collected nine legendary tales of when Chick-fil-A employees literally saved a customer's life in the drive-thru:
Published: Saturday, October 8th, 2022 @ 2:14 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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The world's leading Christian fast food chain suffered a tragedy today as the manager of a local Chick-Fil-A was apparently struck dead shortly after playing secular music in the restaurant.
Published: Sunday, September 18th, 2022 @ 1:07 am
By: Babylon Bee
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PRESIDENT BIDEN: Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. (Applause.) Thank you all very much. Please. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Please.
Published: Thursday, September 15th, 2022 @ 1:36 pm
By: Eastern NC NOW Staff
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Mrs. Mary Louise Brown Hopkins, “Sugar Pig,” age 86, a resident of Washington, NC transitioned to her heavenly home on Friday, September 2, 2022, at her home surrounded by family and friends.
Published: Monday, September 5th, 2022 @ 8:20 am
By: Announcements
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In a touching address to the American people this week, Biden acknowledged that many minorities are struggling in this economy, and vowed to work hard to help them, whether they are "black, yellow, or taco."
Published: Saturday, July 16th, 2022 @ 9:27 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Jill Biden recently referred to Latino people as "Breakfast Tacos," eschewing the more politically correct term, "Brxxkfst Txcxs."
Published: Friday, July 15th, 2022 @ 10:21 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Uh oh! You just came across something incriminating about Hillary Clinton! Whatever you do, don't go to the press! They know everything anyway. Trust no one!
Published: Thursday, June 9th, 2022 @ 11:29 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Have you ever been in a prayer circle where someone says he or she has an "unspoken" prayer request? Aren't you dying to know what it was? Was it something spicy? Something scandalous?
Published: Monday, April 25th, 2022 @ 2:36 am
By: Babylon Bee
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By popular demand, every Buc-ee's location will now add a dozen BBQ sauce pumps to its existing 512 fuel pumps, allowing Texans on the go to pick up gallons and gallons of sauce for their barbecues.
Published: Tuesday, April 19th, 2022 @ 5:50 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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For the first time in more than 20 years, Chef Felicia Daniel has no plans for autumn in North Carolina.
Published: Thursday, September 10th, 2020 @ 12:42 pm
By: Carolina Journal
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At the risk of sounding redundant , I will say again . . .it is raining at the rabbit patch. I am sure some record has been broken in the meteorology department, but how would I know, as cable does not work in the rain here?
Published: Thursday, August 2nd, 2018 @ 6:08 pm
By: Michele Rhem
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The last few days have been a "far cry" from the usual routine of most of my days.
Published: Wednesday, July 18th, 2018 @ 5:14 pm
By: Michele Rhem
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Corner Grocery Stores...Cheez-Its...Politicians
Published: Wednesday, September 21st, 2016 @ 8:47 am
By: Alex J. Ortolano
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I do not need any of the high-tech highfalutin stuff that you get with iPhone, iPads, and computers. I married a GPS system. (Guaranteed personal solution)
Published: Thursday, October 15th, 2015 @ 4:55 am
By: Bobby Tony
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North Carolina has transformed from the Pepsi Generation to the Pepto population. In 1950, the median age in our state was 26.5 years. By 1981, it was almost 30 and the N.C. Division of Aging and Adult Services reports it as 36.9 years in 2009.
Published: Sunday, April 12th, 2015 @ 4:10 am
By: Tom Campbell
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Those who know me know that I am inclined towards spicy food. When at the sub shop, I order the spiciest deli meats and plenty of jalapenos.
Published: Monday, May 7th, 2012 @ 7:39 am
By: John Locke Foundation
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A Saturday morning out at the Home Depot will have its consequences.
Published: Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010 @ 11:20 pm
By: Wyatt Sanderman Day
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