Remorseful China Tries Sending Over Another 'We're Sorry For Creating COVID' Balloon | Eastern NC Now

Following yet another pile of evidence suggesting coronavirus escaped from a lab in Wuhan, the remorseful People's Republic of China tried sending over another "We're Sorry For Creating COVID" balloon to their friends in America.

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    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    BEIJING     Following yet another pile of evidence suggesting coronavirus escaped from a lab in Wuhan, the remorseful People's Republic of China tried sending over another "We're Sorry For Creating COVID" balloon to their friends in America.

    General Secretary Xi Jinping was reportedly "velly solly" for botching an innocent, surreptitious population control measure meant to only decimate his own citizens.

    "We thought it was plainly obvious the engineered supervirus came from our lab in Wuhan. Only a moron would think otherwise," said a Chinese official with a name we gave up trying to pronounce. "We've been sending apology letters to our colleague Dr. Fauci for years, asking him to read them on TV, but he says they keep getting lost in the mail."

    Exhausted balloon engineers were reportedly working on a design that would safely make it past U.S. military defenses, as previous prototypes had been shot down.

    "Our latest apology balloon was shaped like a big heart, but everyone thought it was an influencer's stupid Valentine's Day stunt, which is fair," said the chief balloon engineer whose name looked like a cool calf tattoo. "We almost launched a vessel rigged with a robust anti-missile system to help it survive the trip to the American heartland, but we scrapped it after realizing you might get the wrong idea."

    At publishing time, a humbled General Secretary Xi Jinping relented and allowed the launch of a balloon shaped like Winnie The Pooh to show he "trury means it."

poll#177
Considering the irrefutable fact that the Left /the Democratic Socialists, beginning in March of 2020, employed the repetitive use of the Covid Pandemic as a political cudgel to wrest a presidential election, where their candidate rarely left his basement, from a frightened and beaten down citizenry of this Representative Republic: What does your knowledge NOW, in hindsight, aid in your understanding of the motives of the Authoritarian Left?
  The "Left" cares about all Democratics, so it was imperative that we do whatever it took to elect a lifelong politician to become that Democratic Socialist to forever change US.
  Pandemics are serious business, where our leaders must use wisdom and practicable efforts of all that serve to protect the public from not only the pandemic, but these ignoble usurpers of the Left.
  I lost almost everything in the Covid Pandemic, and I want justice; a justice where only the truth prevails, and the rampant fraud that is now legend is remedied.
163 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

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