Californians Announce Discovery Of Strange New Season 'Winter' | Eastern NC Now

In a groundbreaking announcement, Californians have declared the discovery of a strange new season they're calling "winter."

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    CALIFORNIA     In a groundbreaking announcement, Californians have declared the discovery of a strange new season they're calling "winter."

    According to local experts, winter is a time when temperatures drop, precipitation falls as snow or rain, and days are shorter. While Californians already knew about seasons such as "summer", "the slightly cooler time after summer", and "the few months leading up to summer", this new season is "unprecedented."

    "We were just hanging out, enjoying our usual 70-degree December days, when suddenly it started getting cold," said San Francisco resident, Sarah Johnson. "At first, we thought it was just a weird glitch in the weather app, but then we saw snow falling from the sky! It was crazy."

    The discovery of winter has left many Californians feeling confused and disoriented. "I don't understand why anyone would want to live in a place where this kind of thing happens," said Los Angeles resident, Mark Hernandez. "It's really harshing my mellow. I had to go buy shoes! SHOES!"

    At publishing time, Californians had begun growing concerned for their well-being as the rain accompanying this strange new season seemed to be lasting 40 days and 40 nights.
Go Back

HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

sheriffs stand for law and order against pro-crime governor and legislature
follows socialist primary wins for Democrat US senate nominations in Michigan and Florida
The new Democrat candidates say their real platform is economic equality and hating Jews, and they’re all out of economic equality.

HbAD1

arrogant Talwani abuses power to try to enforce injunction that Supreme Court had lifted
Audiences will reward good storytelling, and “Brand New Day” hits Spiderman’s sweet spot.
illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic
n Aug. 17, President Donald J. Trump endorsed state Rep. Jennifer Balkcom, R-Henderson, who Republicans recently tapped to replace US Rep. Chuck Edwards on the ballot, to represent NC-11 in the upcoming 2026 mid-term election.

HbAD2

more judicial tyranny and abuse of power by corrupt Biden and Obama judges
Prominent Democrats have fueled this climate with reckless rhetoric.
Henry Hinton explains how public education is to blame for lurch toward socialism

HbAD3

 
 
Back to Top