Usher Performs Live Commercial For Old Spice Antiperspirant | Eastern NC Now

Instead of a concert, Usher surprised the nation by using the Super Bowl halftime show to perform a live commercial for Old Spice antiperspirant.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on Eastern NC NOW with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    LAS VEGAS     Instead of a concert, Usher surprised the nation by using the Super Bowl halftime show to perform a live commercial for Old Spice antiperspirant.

    "Are you someone who gets absolutely drenched with sweat after thirty seconds of light dancing?" asked Usher as sweat poured from his brow. "Oh, if only I had thought to use Old Spice antiperspirant, I wouldn't have soaked through three layers of clothing already!"

    Usher then began to demonstrate the horrors of life without Old Spice antiperspirant by flinging copious amounts of sweat onto random strangers with every move of his body. Horrified onlookers screamed in disgust as Usher showered everyone on the field with stream after stream of sweat. Even the illustrious Lil' John got caught in a spray of sweat, causing him to say, "WHAT?!?"

    At publishing time, the field playing surface had been declared unusable due to being completely sloshed with Usher's sweat.
Go Back

HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

If you are covering Roy Cooper in Greensboro today, please consider the following statement from the Republican National Committee:
Obama and Biden judges abuse power for political reasons to try to stop Haitian deportations

HbAD1

teachers union rally held on major socialist / communist May Day holiday
Democrats foment climate of violence against Trump and GOP
Cheryl Hines. Dennis Quaid. Nicki Minaj. All became associated with the Trump administration. What happened next?
A federal grand jury in North Carolina has indicted former FBI Director James Comey on two charges related to making threats against President Donald Trump.
Their goal was simple: to put a Planned Parenthood in every mailbox in America.
Treasury officials allege these groups pose as humanitarian entities while covertly siphoning donations to Hamas.
President Donald Trump has publicly floated regime change and other aggressive actions toward Cuba.

HbAD2

With a new roadside plaque unveiled in Ellerbe on April 23, legendary wrestler and local resident André René Roussimoff is finally getting the formal recognition fans believe he deserves.
Following a string of attacks, critics are calling for denaturalizations. It's not that simple.
Understanding how parties work is important for making informed decisions regarding elected officials.
The solution is not to legalize the problem; it is to enforce the law consistently and deter future illegal immigration.
The teachers union is pushing to cancel school on May 1 as Chicago public schools continue to report dismal student proficiency rates.

HbAD3

Mission accomplished on sending inspiration from the dark side of the moon.
illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic
Beaufort County residents deserve lower taxes and should demand them from government.
"Pay no attention to the folks behind the curtain" was their preference but things are beginning to come to light.
It has been several days since a deranged left-wing lunatic attempted to assassinate President Trump and other members of his administration and yet Roy Cooper is STILL silent out of fear of alienating his base, who is perfectly okay with violence.

HbAD4

 
 
Back to Top