Dad Again Uses Kids As Excuse To Get McDonald’s | Eastern North Carolina Now | Local father of three Kirk Watson once again exploited his children's insatiable desire for fast food to get himself some McDonald's, say sources.

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    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    GOSHEN, IN     Local father of three Kirk Watson once again exploited his children's insatiable desire for fast food to get himself some McDonald's, say sources.

    "Man, I could really go for a Big Mac and a shake," Watson reportedly said as he arrived home. Witnesses claim he then started poking his children and planting the seed of happy meals in their impressionable minds.

    Before long, his elaborate scheme had come to fruition. His children swarmed their mother and began pleading for McDonald's. Watson then quickly followed in for the kill shot.

    "Honey, you know, it'd be good for the kids, and I think you could use a break. You shouldn't have to slave in here every night," Watson told his wife. "Let's take the kids out to McDonald's!"

    His wife attempted to protest as she had already begun prepping a healthy meal of beef roast and Brussels sprouts, but was worn down when her youngest child began to cry.

    Kirk Watson hugged his four-year-old daughter tight. "It's okay, honey. Of course, mommy wants you to be happy."

    At publishing time, Kirk Watson had ordered a large Big Mac combo with a large chocolate shake and spent the rest of the night on the toilet.
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