World Economic Forum Introduces Pumpkin Spice Crickets | Eastern NC Now

In order to both prod the human population as a whole to sample alternative food sources as well as capitalize on the annual fall craze, officials at the World Economic Forum in Switzerland unveiled their plan to introduce new pumpkin spice-flavored crickets.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    GENEVA     In order to both prod the human population as a whole to sample alternative food sources as well as capitalize on the annual fall craze, officials at the World Economic Forum in Switzerland unveiled their plan to introduce new pumpkin spice-flavored crickets.

    "We continue to believe the future of the human race depends on finding more sustainable - and not at all disgusting in any way - sources of food," said Gustaf Weisenheimer at a press conference announcing the new flavor. "And while crickets are wonderfully delicious by themselves, we wanted to do something very special for the fall season."

    The announcement was met with a mixed response from the public. "I'm a nut for anything pumpkin spice-flavored," said full-time mother and part-time goat farmer Annie Lupascu, "but crickets? No. That's gross, no matter what spin you try to put on it." Others weren't entirely opposed to trying the new product. "Sure, I'll try some crickets," said Caitlin Anderson. "Honestly, I would probably eat a shoe if it was pumpkin spice-flavored."

    There are rumors that this could be a sign of things to come. If the pumpkin spice flavor goes over well with consumers, the WEF has tentative plans to develop other popular cricket flavors, including cheddar & sour scream, flamin' hot, and cool ranch crickets.

    At publishing time, officials were eagerly awaiting word regarding the public's response while simultaneously denying the allegations that they are actually producing crickets because they are the favorite food of a cabal of secret lizard people overlords ruling the world behind the scenes.
Go Back

HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

If you are covering Roy Cooper in Greensboro today, please consider the following statement from the Republican National Committee:
Obama and Biden judges abuse power for political reasons to try to stop Haitian deportations

HbAD1

teachers union rally held on major socialist / communist May Day holiday
Democrats foment climate of violence against Trump and GOP
Cheryl Hines. Dennis Quaid. Nicki Minaj. All became associated with the Trump administration. What happened next?
A federal grand jury in North Carolina has indicted former FBI Director James Comey on two charges related to making threats against President Donald Trump.
Their goal was simple: to put a Planned Parenthood in every mailbox in America.
Treasury officials allege these groups pose as humanitarian entities while covertly siphoning donations to Hamas.
President Donald Trump has publicly floated regime change and other aggressive actions toward Cuba.

HbAD2

With a new roadside plaque unveiled in Ellerbe on April 23, legendary wrestler and local resident André René Roussimoff is finally getting the formal recognition fans believe he deserves.
Following a string of attacks, critics are calling for denaturalizations. It's not that simple.
Understanding how parties work is important for making informed decisions regarding elected officials.
The solution is not to legalize the problem; it is to enforce the law consistently and deter future illegal immigration.
The teachers union is pushing to cancel school on May 1 as Chicago public schools continue to report dismal student proficiency rates.

HbAD3

 
 
Back to Top