9 Conspiracy Theories We Predict Will Come True In 2023 | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    The COVID pandemic opened our eyes to the legitimacy of conspiracy theories when they started being proven true left and right. Naturally, we started paying attention.

    Here are some conspiracy theories we predict will be proven true:

1. TikTok was developed by the Chinese military to make everyone in America trans: We're as surprised as you are!
2. Bush invaded Iraq to rob the grave of Gilgamesh and unlock the secret of eternal life: The Iraq War was totally justified after all.
3. Your 10th-grade English teacher really did fail you just because he didn't like your face: And after you spent all that time reading The Grapes of Wrath. Ugh!
4. Taiwan will vote to become part of China in a very free and open election and no one will die at all: Peace in our time!
5. The destruction of meat plants was actually caused by Bill Gates in a ski mask throwing Molotov cocktails: Oh no! He owns all the farmland too!
6. The White House Easter Bunny really was Barack Obama: Not sure yet if he is secretly running the White House or just another furry.
7. Joe Biden has been dead for over thirty years: Spooky!
8. Rachel Levine only changed genders to win USA Today's less competitive "Woman" Of The Year: He is now detransitioning and prefers to be called Ricky Ricardo. BaBaLoo!
9. Trump won: Yuge, if true!