Buttigieg Defends Job Performance By Reminding Everyone He's Gay | Eastern North Carolina Now

Pete Buttigieg has addressed criticism surrounding his lackluster performance as Secretary of Transportation by reminding everyone that he's really, really gay.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    D.C.     Pete Buttigieg has addressed criticism surrounding his lackluster performance as Secretary of Transportation by reminding everyone that he's really, really gay.

    "Listen, everyone, with respect to my track record as transportation secretary I'd like to remind everyone that I am in fact a deeply homosexual man," said Pete Buttigieg. "I know many of you have expressed concerns about our crumbling infrastructure, and recent grounding of all aircraft, but to be clear I go home every night and kiss my gay husband, who is gay along with me. We are both gay. I am gay."

    Many Americans expressed concern that the country's transportation system was headed in the wrong direction, but once they were reminded that the man at the helm of all U.S. transportation was in fact a gay man they were put at ease.

    "As a man who is married to another man, I can assure you that I am the most qualified man for this task and that transportation in this country has never been better," added Buttigieg. "And it's only going to get stronger. As soon as I get back from my 48-month paternity leave, we will build back better like never before."

    At publishing time, Buttigieg had vowed to continue his campaign against racist roads and introduced a new campaign against cis-hetero-normative waterways.
Go Back


Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )




Genital mutilation of males has severe side effects says Canadian study Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Millions Of Lives Saved By Person Wearing Mask While Walking Alone On Sidewalk


HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic
Displacing Constitutional Law

HbAD1

As the first presidential debate between President Joe Biden and Donald Trump nears, the Biden campaign is ratcheting up its attacks on the presumptive Republican nominee’s 34 felony convictions.
If you want to show how NOT to build a school there is no better example than this new Eastern Elementary School being planned in secret.
Average increase in costs at the grocery store
Standards for DACA, championed by President Joe Biden, were set so low

HbAD2

A rule that compels speech and engages in such viewpoint discrimination is impermissible
Tucker Carlson, Fox News Channel’s biggest prime time star, has left the cable news giant.
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis made his first trip overseas since 2019 this week, meeting with Japanese Prime Minister Fumio Kishida in Tokyo on Monday to discuss economic matters as the 44-year-old gears up for a likely presidential campaign.
Judge has ruled that her case can proceed on charges of civil conspiracy and fraud
now Democrat candidate in Texas and faked hate creime against GOP opponent
President Joe Biden delivered remarks on Tuesday at gun control advocacy group Everytown’s annual conference, Gun Sense University — and as is often the case when Biden speaks about guns, critics were quick to point out a series of factual errors.

HbAD3

 
Back to Top