Dick Cheney Thrilled To No Longer Be Least Likable Cheney | Eastern North Carolina Now | After years of being a social and political pariah, former Vice President Dick Cheney is overjoyed to no longer be the least likable Cheney in America.

Coronavirus Disease 2019 (COVID-19)
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON D.C.     After years of being a social and political pariah, former Vice President Dick Cheney is overjoyed to no longer be the least likable Cheney in America.

    "It's incredible. I literally shot someone, and people like me more," said a gleeful Mr. Cheney. "Spying on American citizens, the war in Iraq - all water under the bridge now, thanks to my daughter. Way to go, Liz!"

    Having drawn frequent comparisons to Darth Vader, Dick Cheney had resigned himself to being the proverbial anchor weighing down the family name. "They always kicked me out of the family photos so I wouldn't damage Liz's career," chuckled Mr. Cheney. "At this point, I could skinny dip in the Reflecting Pool and it couldn't make things worse for her. Ah, freedom at last!"

    Liz Cheney reportedly received a huge gift basket from her Dad after the first week of the January 6th hearings. "It felt so nice to know that even if everyone else was against me, my Dad was still in my corner," said Ms. Cheney. "Although I didn't quite understand his note. It just said, 'Taste my pain!'."

    At publishing time, Gallup released a poll showing the Cheney's neck-and-neck with the Biden's for America's least favorite political family.
Go Back

HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

Former President Trump on Wednesday claimed that the Department of Justice (DOJ) and the FBI had asked his legal team in early June to put an extra lock on the door to the room where boxes of documents reportedly marked as classified were stored.
To paraphrase Alice, who used the term to describe her adventures in Wonderland, election politics in America is getting “curiouser and curiouser.” North Carolina has been in the forefront of innovation and implementation
The trouble with socialism is that you eventually run out of other people's money
A key measure of inflation rose to a new 40-year high in June, according to new data, marking troubling news for Americans as the economy officially entered a recession on Thursday.
CDC Director Rochelle Walensky said during an interview on Sunday that “there is a plan” to get unvaccinated essential workers “education and counseling” so they will feel comfortable getting vaccinated.
N.C. Republican Congressional delegation outraged at FBI raid on former President Donald Trump's Mar-a-Lago home in Florida.

HbAD1

A federal magistrate judge has ordered the Department of Justice (DOJ) to respond to requests to make public the warrant authorizing the FBI’s unprecedented Monday raid of former President Donald Trump’s residence.
New Zealand Prime Jacinda Ardern smiled during an interview late last week when saying that she was effectively creating two different classes of people in her country that have different levels of freedom depending on whether they are vaccinated.
On Tuesday, Democrats filed an emergency motion to stay federal Judge James Dever’s decision last week to order the North Carolina State Board of Elections to place the Green Party’s candidates on the ballot.
Communist China threatened to shoot down Democrat House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s (D-CA) plane on Friday if the 82-year-old lawmaker tries to visit Taiwan.
those 87,000 new auditors will be hard asses
China accused the White House of lying when it claimed President Joe Biden pressed Chinese President Xi Jinping on the country’s systematic abuse of Uyghur Muslims when the leaders spoke by phone Thursday morning.
Former President Donald J. Trump was seen fleeing on a golf cart while shouting defiantly at federal agents Monday. Witnesses claim he led authorities on a daring chase that reached speeds of up to 30 Mph.
Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) slammed Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases and the Chief Medical Advisor to the President, on Sunday over a new letter from the National Institutes of Health (NIH)
Disgraced star Will Smith finally broke his silence on what occurred between him and wife Jada Pinkett Smith before Smith walked on stage at the 2022 Oscars and struck Chris Rock in the face.

HbAD2

As students head back to campus this month, school safety is a growing part of the equation facing administrators and parents.
Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents found 73 illegal immigrants in homes believed to be operated by human smugglers in an affluent area of Washington D.C.
Sen. Mike Lee (R-UT) called on Sen. Joe Manchin (D-WV) to switch political parties during an interview on Sunday night, saying that Manchin needed to abandon the party of “inflation” and “lawlessness.”
The Inflation Reduction Act reportedly provides for additional funding to hire 140 million new IRS agents — one for every home in America.
The Chicago Department of Public Health warned attendees of the Lollapalooza music festival to test their recreational drugs for fentanyl.
UK AG Suella Braverman says schools breaking law to force transgenderism
Fox News contributor Dan Bongino erupted Monday afternoon after the FBI executed a search warrant at the Florida home of former President Donald Trump.
On Monday, Larry Summers, a former top economic adviser to President Barack Obama, pushed back on remarks that Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen made on Sunday where she dismissed Summers’ concerns over inflation.

HbAD3

 
Back to Top