Wife Racing To Clean House Before Firefighters Arrive | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    NORTH HEMPSTEAD, NY     Local wife Amanda Bowman raced against the clock today, trying to get the house in order before firefighters arrived to put out the massive blaze destroying the home.

    "Oh my goodness, they'll be here any minute!" said Mrs. Bowman, as smoke filled the kitchen. "I'll just do a quick rinse on the dishes!"

    As the upstairs became engulfed in flames, Mrs. Bowman resigned herself to leaving a few rooms untidy. "Ugh, the baseboards look terrible," she sighed. "Maybe they won't notice. Hey honey? Once you get that burning beam off of your chest, can you please empty the trash? It's almost overflowing."

    With the kitchen presentable, Mrs. Bowman raced into action as she heard the sirens. "Oh no - they're early!" she cried. "Okay, I've got the cushions arranged. I'll only do one quick sweep of the floor before I hurl myself out the window to escape the flames. Oh, this is so embarrassing!"

    At publishing time, Mrs. Bowman was heard repeatedly apologizing to the firefighting crew for the house being such a deeply-charred mess.