Eight Ways To Point To God During Football Games (Besides Tebowing) | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    Remember the good ol' days when you could Tebow in a public-school stadium without fear of losing your job? With football season getting started, The Babylon Bee is here to save the day with a list of other ways besides Tebowing to honor God during a football game.

1. Enter the stadium on a flaming chariot: Set a Heavenly tone right out of the gate.
2. Write the entire book of 2 Samuel on your eye black stickers: Just make sure you write really small.
3. Bring in a Pentecostal pastor to slay the defensive line in the spirit: The Lord is my blocker, I shall not want.
4. If you're a quarterback, take all your snaps from the shotgun, because touching the center's butt is gay: Avoid even the appearance of evil.
5. Throw a Hail Mary on every single play: Note: only works for Catholics.
6. Pluck out your eyes to avoid looking at the dancing cheerleaders: Avert your eyes and stay pure!
7. After scoring a touchdown, spike the ball in your opponent's face and scream "Boom shakalaka, sucka!": It will remind fans how the Lord will one day crush His enemies under His feet.
8. When a teammate slaps your butt after a play, turn the other cheek: Then, do unto him as he did unto you.

    Try one at your next football game, or better yet, try them all! Let us know any we missed!