The great misnomer for non Christians that the day Jesus Christ was executed by occupying Romans, celebrated by Christians as "Good" Friday, must be a paradox of ominous proportions.
Published: Saturday, March 30th, 2024 @ 7:52 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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Washington, D.C. — Today, Congressman Greg Murphy, M.D. issued the following statement in response to his meeting with representatives of Duke Energy after reports revealed the usage of Chinese batteries on Camp Lejeune:
Published: Wednesday, February 28th, 2024 @ 9:13 am
By: Eastern NC NOW Staff
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Choose wisely where you will spend eternity
Published: Saturday, February 24th, 2024 @ 8:03 am
By: Countrygirl1411
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Excitement abounded over the weekend as the long-awaited Sphere at the Venitian Resort had its grand opening. Attendees reported a wondrous, mind-blowing experience that would have been truly magnificent if it had not been spoiled by a U2 concert.
Published: Thursday, November 30th, 2023 @ 6:39 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Giving thanks
Published: Saturday, November 25th, 2023 @ 6:22 pm
By: Countrygirl1411
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Former President Donald Trump and his former vice president, Mike Pence, traded blows on Wednesday over the events of January 6, 2021, as both men seek to become the Republican Party nominee in 2024.
Published: Sunday, November 19th, 2023 @ 6:21 am
By: Daily Wire
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According to sources, local atheist Sam Thorp has been gloriously converted to Christianity only seconds after hearing Johnny Cash's hit song "The Man Comes Around" for the first time.
Published: Saturday, November 4th, 2023 @ 7:35 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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All of the dogs living in Heaven fled in horror today upon the arrival of notorious neutering advocate Bob Barker.
Published: Sunday, October 29th, 2023 @ 1:17 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The God of the Universe shouted in excited shock today as a batter pointed directly at Him after belting a home run.
Published: Thursday, October 19th, 2023 @ 9:02 am
By: Babylon Bee
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After a terrifying three days, the prophet Jonah gathered his Assyrian followers around him to recount the harrowing tale of being tossed into the sea and swallowed by Lizzo, that mighty beast of old.
Published: Saturday, September 30th, 2023 @ 7:50 am
By: Babylon Bee
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I have watched from afar, and, on occasion, have interacted with the banality that is at the core of the clichéd existence of the recent and typical co-called "Social Justice Warrior."
Published: Thursday, September 28th, 2023 @ 8:33 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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Scholars at Dallas Theological Seminary say they now believe that Jacob's first assessment of Leah was to describe her as "mid".
Published: Sunday, September 24th, 2023 @ 1:35 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Today I'm sure the majority of people are aware of or familiar with A.I., but what is it really?
Published: Tuesday, August 8th, 2023 @ 11:31 am
By: Will Simmons
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Parishioners at a local church have noticed a peculiar pattern, as the staff's female pastor preaches a much angrier, "hellfire & brimstone" style sermon every month or so.
Published: Tuesday, July 25th, 2023 @ 5:18 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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The Almighty God finally had enough and had to break some difficult news to a local churchgoer today, as He sent word to a woman that she was no longer allowed to bring her tambourine to church.
Published: Tuesday, July 18th, 2023 @ 6:50 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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What does Independence Day - the 4th of July - mean to you?
Published: Wednesday, July 5th, 2023 @ 12:13 am
By: Diane Rufino
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Perhaps what Independence Day is all about is to reflect on our history and to rekindle our revolutionary spirit every year... our great love of liberty.
Published: Tuesday, July 4th, 2023 @ 6:19 am
By: Diane Rufino
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Forgetting the famous saying about leaves of three, Adam came to the horrible realization that something was terribly wrong with his first leafy covering.
Published: Monday, June 26th, 2023 @ 8:01 am
By: Daily Wire
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After watching his wife unwrap a present from every human on the face of the earth, Adam started to become suspicious that Eve had made up this whole "Mother's Day" celebration.
Published: Sunday, June 11th, 2023 @ 2:46 am
By: Babylon Bee
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It was discreetly referred to as Operation Overlord - the final push into Fortress Europe through the inflexible sea wall, built by the Nazi overlords, just a spare few miles from the free shores of Great Britain, where the entire United States Expeditionary Force was stationed.
Published: Tuesday, June 6th, 2023 @ 4:52 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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Every year on June 6, our nation pauses to remember the thousands of brave Americans and American allies who stormed the beaches of Normandy to launch the campaign to liberate Europe from the oppression and extermination by the Nazi regime in World War II.
Published: Tuesday, June 6th, 2023 @ 7:02 am
By: Diane Rufino
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President Joe Biden was noticeably absent as world leaders gathered to attend the coronation of Charles III as the king of the United Kingdom on Saturday, the first coronation ceremony since 1953.
Published: Wednesday, May 10th, 2023 @ 7:01 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Sources from the Almighty have confirmed that like everything else for the Orthodox, the rapture will also take place one week after the regular rapture.
Published: Wednesday, April 19th, 2023 @ 8:54 am
By: Babylon Bee
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On Thursday, Lt. Gov. Mark Robinson released a statement saying he’s holding a rally on April 22 to share a “special announcement.” He’s expected to enter the gubernatorial race.
Published: Saturday, April 15th, 2023 @ 10:47 am
By: Carolina Journal
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A local man's heart was finally apprehended by the Almighty God today, as he humbled himself and turned to the Lord in prayer while sitting in his seat on an airplane and seeing an obese man with his stomach hanging out from his shirt making his way down the aisle.
Published: Thursday, April 6th, 2023 @ 12:16 am
By: Babylon Bee
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When NBC news host, Lester Holt said there had been 68 mass shootings in 2023, my mouth dropped. That’s more mass shootings than days so far in 2023.
Published: Monday, March 6th, 2023 @ 9:03 am
By: Lib Campbell
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A local man wallowed in frustration today while wrestling with the idea that the Almighty God, Creator of the universe, with infinitely more wisdom than any human, could possibly have a different opinion than he has.
Published: Sunday, February 19th, 2023 @ 1:45 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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God Regrets Writing 'Sing To The Lord A New Song' After Hearing The New Songs Christians Are SingingWorship leaders worldwide were left stunned today after word began to spread that the Lord now regrets including the command "Sing unto the Lord a new song" in His Word after hearing the new songs Christians are currently singing.
Published: Wednesday, February 1st, 2023 @ 11:38 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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“I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen – not only because I see it, but because by it, I see everything else.” — C.S. Lewis
Published: Friday, January 27th, 2023 @ 2:39 pm
By: Diane Rufino
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Having gotten into a game of hide-and-seek with the omniscient God of the universe, Adam and Eve reported feeling confident that the Lord would never find them in their perfect hiding spot behind a tree.
Published: Wednesday, January 11th, 2023 @ 8:04 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A local man breathed a sigh of relief at the gates of Heaven as he entered the hereafter today, receiving a "Well done" commendation from God Almighty for spending his life arguing with other people in the comments section of YouTube videos.
Published: Monday, January 9th, 2023 @ 8:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
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