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According to sources, local man Chet Bivley is enjoying a cigar with his friends at the local cigar lounge and has just mentioned how much he loves it, despite the fact that he will soon be puking all his guts out into a trash can.
According to sources, local man Chet Bivley is enjoying a cigar with his friends at the local cigar lounge and has just mentioned how much he loves it, despite the fact that he will soon be puking all his guts out into a trash can.
 
As part of an ongoing corporate initiative to show solidarity with the Palestinian people and support anti-Zionist liberation efforts, kiosks at the global coffee chain Starbucks will now ask customers if they would like to donate $1 to buy a bullet for Hamas.
As part of an ongoing corporate initiative to show solidarity with the Palestinian people and support anti-Zionist liberation efforts, kiosks at the global coffee chain Starbucks will now ask customers if they would like to donate $1 to buy a bullet for Hamas.
 
It's that time of year, men! It's time to gather up all the love and appreciation you feel for your wife all year long and make a last-minute trip to the Walgreens down on the corner to buy her the perfect Christmas gift.
It's that time of year, men! It's time to gather up all the love and appreciation you feel for your wife all year long and make a last-minute trip to the Walgreens down on the corner to buy her the perfect Christmas gift.
 
New York Gov. Kathy Hochul’s Department of Health commissioned a survey distributed to state and county leaders exploring a ban on all tobacco products, despite lawmakers’ declining support to prohibit menthol cigarettes and other flavored products.
New York Gov. Kathy Hochul’s Department of Health commissioned a survey distributed to state and county leaders exploring a ban on all tobacco products, despite lawmakers’ declining support to prohibit menthol cigarettes and other flavored products.
 
In an effort to draw more fans to baseball, the MLB has done its best to make the sport less like baseball.
In an effort to draw more fans to baseball, the MLB has done its best to make the sport less like baseball.
 
In addition to certifying Mitch McConnell, Diane Feinstein, and John Fetterman as fit to serve in prominent roles in the legislative branch of the United States government, the attending physician at the U.S. Capitol has medically cleared a bowl of Jell-O to serve in the Senate.
In addition to certifying Mitch McConnell, Diane Feinstein, and John Fetterman as fit to serve in prominent roles in the legislative branch of the United States government, the attending physician at the U.S. Capitol has medically cleared a bowl of Jell-O to serve in the Senate.
 
Parents around the world live in crippling fear of their children becoming fans of Dr. Jordan B. Peterson, which is a dark road that can lead to misogyny and fascism.
Parents around the world live in crippling fear of their children becoming fans of Dr. Jordan B. Peterson, which is a dark road that can lead to misogyny and fascism.
 
Lately, my social media feeds have been full of Barbie-branded memes, AI-generated photos that you can put a picture of yourself and “become an instant Barbie,” and pink. Lots and lots of pink.
Lately, my social media feeds have been full of Barbie-branded memes, AI-generated photos that you can put a picture of yourself and “become an instant Barbie,” and pink. Lots and lots of pink.
 
With the month of June coming to a close and various consumer brands across the retail spectrum looking for ways to differentiate themselves in a non-Pride Month marketplace
With the month of June coming to a close and various consumer brands across the retail spectrum looking for ways to differentiate themselves in a non-Pride Month marketplace
 
Admissions faculty at Harvard was devastated today upon hearing the news that they could no longer use racial discrimination to turn their school into a diverse rainbow of beautiful mediocrity.
Admissions faculty at Harvard was devastated today upon hearing the news that they could no longer use racial discrimination to turn their school into a diverse rainbow of beautiful mediocrity.
 
In order to save the environment from the intoxicating smell of delicious New York pizza cooked in a woodfire oven, Mayor Eric Adams has announced that all pizza must now be cooked under the hand dryer of a public restroom.
In order to save the environment from the intoxicating smell of delicious New York pizza cooked in a woodfire oven, Mayor Eric Adams has announced that all pizza must now be cooked under the hand dryer of a public restroom.
 
Former President Donald Trump entered the T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas, Nevada, Saturday night to a roaring crowd, meeting with numerous celebrities and even a victorious fighter at UFC 290.
Former President Donald Trump entered the T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas, Nevada, Saturday night to a roaring crowd, meeting with numerous celebrities and even a victorious fighter at UFC 290.
 
Being cool is a state of mind, but you also need to know what you're doing so you don't end up looking like a total dork. Take smoking a cigar for example. If done correctly, you're the coolest guy in the room, but if you don't pull it off, everyone will think you're a loser.
Being cool is a state of mind, but you also need to know what you're doing so you don't end up looking like a total dork. Take smoking a cigar for example. If done correctly, you're the coolest guy in the room, but if you don't pull it off, everyone will think you're a loser.
 
Let's face it, getting good sleep can be tough these days! From the busyness of parenting fussy children to the stress of the day's news, there's always something keeping you awake.
Let's face it, getting good sleep can be tough these days! From the busyness of parenting fussy children to the stress of the day's news, there's always something keeping you awake.
 
ECU part of comprehensive tobacco and nicotine study for FDA
ECU part of comprehensive tobacco and nicotine study for FDA
 
In a burst of energy and glass shards, everyone's favorite kid beverage giant unveiled its newest mascot "Kool-Aid Woman" at a press conference Wednesday.
In a burst of energy and glass shards, everyone's favorite kid beverage giant unveiled its newest mascot "Kool-Aid Woman" at a press conference Wednesday.
 
Anheuser-Busch, the company that makes Bud Light, has suffered weeks of stagnant sales following a simple marketing campaign celebrating breathtaking female woman Dylan Mulvaney, who is totally a woman.
Anheuser-Busch, the company that makes Bud Light, has suffered weeks of stagnant sales following a simple marketing campaign celebrating breathtaking female woman Dylan Mulvaney, who is totally a woman.
 
Researchers with the U.S. Food & Drug Administration have determined that cereal reaches its peak flavor at 10 pm if eaten on the couch while watching a true crime documentary.
Researchers with the U.S. Food & Drug Administration have determined that cereal reaches its peak flavor at 10 pm if eaten on the couch while watching a true crime documentary.
 
Legendary NFL running back Jim Brown, one the league’s first superstars, has died. He was 87 years old.
Legendary NFL running back Jim Brown, one the league’s first superstars, has died. He was 87 years old.
 
With inflation remaining stubbornly persistent, the Easter Bunny has been forced to hide ramen noodle packages around people's yards in lieu of his usual eggs.
With inflation remaining stubbornly persistent, the Easter Bunny has been forced to hide ramen noodle packages around people's yards in lieu of his usual eggs.
 
A producer of lab-grown meat unveiled an ancient appetizer that’s perfect for your Paleo diet.
A producer of lab-grown meat unveiled an ancient appetizer that’s perfect for your Paleo diet.
 
Seeking to be fully prepared to capitalize on any potential woke misstep by another major American corporation, Daily Wire CEO Jeremy Boreing is now reportedly setting up shop in a large warehouse full of tires, waiting for Goodyear to say something to cause conservative outrage.
Seeking to be fully prepared to capitalize on any potential woke misstep by another major American corporation, Daily Wire CEO Jeremy Boreing is now reportedly setting up shop in a large warehouse full of tires, waiting for Goodyear to say something to cause conservative outrage.
 
Utilities in Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky shut Ohio River water intake valves early Sunday morning over concerns about contamination by hazardous materials from a train that derailed in East Palestine, Ohio.
Utilities in Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky shut Ohio River water intake valves early Sunday morning over concerns about contamination by hazardous materials from a train that derailed in East Palestine, Ohio.
 
Several users of the remarkable software ChatGPT are reporting an apparent glitch that occurs whenever someone asks the AI to say something nice about Donald Trump.
Several users of the remarkable software ChatGPT are reporting an apparent glitch that occurs whenever someone asks the AI to say something nice about Donald Trump.
 
New business creation filings grew 40% in 2021 over 2020, for a total of 178,300 new businesses in the state.
New business creation filings grew 40% in 2021 over 2020, for a total of 178,300 new businesses in the state.
 
To cope with increasing challenges resulting from rising food shortages around the globe, popular family restaurant chain Cheesecake Factory has decided to cut its menu down to a paltry 32 pages.
To cope with increasing challenges resulting from rising food shortages around the globe, popular family restaurant chain Cheesecake Factory has decided to cut its menu down to a paltry 32 pages.
 
Fear gripped the city today as a maniacal villain once again put innocent dozens of citizens' lives at risk as the Joker (who is reportedly pregnant) and his gang of homicidal clowns held the First National Bank of Gotham City hostage until his unusual demands were met.
Fear gripped the city today as a maniacal villain once again put innocent dozens of citizens' lives at risk as the Joker (who is reportedly pregnant) and his gang of homicidal clowns held the First National Bank of Gotham City hostage until his unusual demands were met.
 
Local man Byron Hardin achieved opulence beyond the greatest of medieval royalty after adding some black pepper to his box of Kraft mac and cheese.
Local man Byron Hardin achieved opulence beyond the greatest of medieval royalty after adding some black pepper to his box of Kraft mac and cheese.
 
Despite suburban white women demurring from widespread Republican support in the 2020 election, new polling estimates a 25%+ increase in this key demographic's projected support for conservatives in the upcoming midterm elections.
Despite suburban white women demurring from widespread Republican support in the 2020 election, new polling estimates a 25%+ increase in this key demographic's projected support for conservatives in the upcoming midterm elections.
 
Experts say they remain baffled at the phenomenon of candy manufacturers still insisting on making flavors other than the undisputed best flavor of all time: green apple.
Experts say they remain baffled at the phenomenon of candy manufacturers still insisting on making flavors other than the undisputed best flavor of all time: green apple.
 
Polling data shows that Democrats have a chance of losing both chambers of Congress. But it's not all doom and gloom! Democrats have some noteworthy achievements under their belt that they can cite to remind Americans why they should stay in power.
Polling data shows that Democrats have a chance of losing both chambers of Congress. But it's not all doom and gloom! Democrats have some noteworthy achievements under their belt that they can cite to remind Americans why they should stay in power.
 
Lakewood Church Pastor Joel Osteen has begun selling his own unique brand of table salt, which is completely devoid of any and all saltiness.
Lakewood Church Pastor Joel Osteen has begun selling his own unique brand of table salt, which is completely devoid of any and all saltiness.
 
A fascinating new study has revealed that the vast majority of people, when presented with a blind taste test, can't tell the difference between candy corn and a dusty, old orange crayon we found in a junk drawer.
A fascinating new study has revealed that the vast majority of people, when presented with a blind taste test, can't tell the difference between candy corn and a dusty, old orange crayon we found in a junk drawer.
 
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