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28 Results found for joel osteen

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It's a New Year, which means it's time to make resolutions — even for prominent evangelical leaders. The Babylon Bee asked the following well-known figures in the faith what they hope to accomplish in 2024:
It's a New Year, which means it's time to make resolutions — even for prominent evangelical leaders. The Babylon Bee asked the following well-known figures in the faith what they hope to accomplish in 2024:
 
Dread it. Run from it. 2024 has arrived all the same. But fear not as the team at The Babylon Bee has been hard at work for you coming up with the most probable, and completely accurate 2024 predictions to help you make it through the New Year.
Dread it. Run from it. 2024 has arrived all the same. But fear not as the team at The Babylon Bee has been hard at work for you coming up with the most probable, and completely accurate 2024 predictions to help you make it through the New Year.
 
PENSACOLA, FL — As controversy continues to swirl following Pope Francis's pronouncement that Catholic priests are free to bless people who are in same-sex relationships, a local protestant man slept soundly
PENSACOLA, FL — As controversy continues to swirl following Pope Francis's pronouncement that Catholic priests are free to bless people who are in same-sex relationships, a local protestant man slept soundly
 
Christians can be hard to buy gifts for. You've gotta know what they're into, what kinds of gifts they'd consider sinful, and most of all, what denomination they're a part of. There's no holiday faux pas like accidentally gifting a John MacArthur book to a charismatic.
Christians can be hard to buy gifts for. You've gotta know what they're into, what kinds of gifts they'd consider sinful, and most of all, what denomination they're a part of. There's no holiday faux pas like accidentally gifting a John MacArthur book to a charismatic.
 
A woman carrying an AR-15 that had “Palestine” written on it started shooting at the megachurch of celebrity pastor Joel Osteen in Houston on Sunday, injuring one man before she was shot and killed by two off-duty officers working as security, police said.
A woman carrying an AR-15 that had “Palestine” written on it started shooting at the megachurch of celebrity pastor Joel Osteen in Houston on Sunday, injuring one man before she was shot and killed by two off-duty officers working as security, police said.
 
What began as a pleasant seminar at Lakewood Church devolved into an awkward situation today, as Senior Pastor Joel Osteen was stumped by one attendee who asked him to name three books from the Bible.
What began as a pleasant seminar at Lakewood Church devolved into an awkward situation today, as Senior Pastor Joel Osteen was stumped by one attendee who asked him to name three books from the Bible.
 
SHANGHAI — In response to some confusion around China's ongoing ban on Bibles, President Xi called a press conference to confirm an exception to his prohibition on God's Holy Word will be made for a popular version known as "The Message."
SHANGHAI — In response to some confusion around China's ongoing ban on Bibles, President Xi called a press conference to confirm an exception to his prohibition on God's Holy Word will be made for a popular version known as "The Message."
 
It can be so confusing, trying to figure out which of the 437 Christian denominations you want to join. In fact, scientists believe there are almost as many denominations as there are genders. That's a lot of different ways to do church!
It can be so confusing, trying to figure out which of the 437 Christian denominations you want to join. In fact, scientists believe there are almost as many denominations as there are genders. That's a lot of different ways to do church!
 
In accordance with his annual tradition, Joel Osteen has once again decided to wear his "pastor" costume for Halloween this year.
In accordance with his annual tradition, Joel Osteen has once again decided to wear his "pastor" costume for Halloween this year.
 
Due to quality control issues, Saint Peter's questionnaire at the Pearly Gates has gotten stricter. Still think you can get into heaven with all your terrible opinions? Check out this list and find out!
Due to quality control issues, Saint Peter's questionnaire at the Pearly Gates has gotten stricter. Still think you can get into heaven with all your terrible opinions? Check out this list and find out!
 
For just 63 cents a day, less than a cup of coffee, you can save all the dogs and cats who are tied to trees in the snow and cold of winter.
For just 63 cents a day, less than a cup of coffee, you can save all the dogs and cats who are tied to trees in the snow and cold of winter.
 
In a shocking turn of events, famed prosperity gospel preacher Joel Osteen has suddenly gone bankrupt after local woman Carissa Stewart named and claimed his entire estate.
In a shocking turn of events, famed prosperity gospel preacher Joel Osteen has suddenly gone bankrupt after local woman Carissa Stewart named and claimed his entire estate.
 
Archaeologists have discovered the unmistakable remains from humongous "Minion" inflatables that Mary and Joseph used to decorate the front of the stable.
Archaeologists have discovered the unmistakable remains from humongous "Minion" inflatables that Mary and Joseph used to decorate the front of the stable.
 
Be alert! Horror movies are proven to murder your soul by decapitating it with a spiritual machete.
Be alert! Horror movies are proven to murder your soul by decapitating it with a spiritual machete.
 
Lakewood Church Pastor Joel Osteen has begun selling his own unique brand of table salt, which is completely devoid of any and all saltiness.
Lakewood Church Pastor Joel Osteen has begun selling his own unique brand of table salt, which is completely devoid of any and all saltiness.
 
We sent our Babylon Bee investigative journalists all across the country to find out which walk-up songs famous pastors are using to hype up the crowd as they leave the on-deck circle and take the stage.
We sent our Babylon Bee investigative journalists all across the country to find out which walk-up songs famous pastors are using to hype up the crowd as they leave the on-deck circle and take the stage.
 
We all know there are tremendous benefits to reading the Bible, but it's so hard to be consistent with reading it every day!
We all know there are tremendous benefits to reading the Bible, but it's so hard to be consistent with reading it every day!
 
Houston pastor Joel Osteen has released an exciting new study Bible where he has carefully gone through and redacted every single word of the text: The Redacted Study Bible.
Houston pastor Joel Osteen has released an exciting new study Bible where he has carefully gone through and redacted every single word of the text: The Redacted Study Bible.
 
Joel Osteen took the Apostle Paul to task on Sunday, calling out his awful habit of negative self-talk and overly mournful diatribes.
Joel Osteen took the Apostle Paul to task on Sunday, calling out his awful habit of negative self-talk and overly mournful diatribes.
 
We get it. It's hard to read the divinely inspired word of the creator of the universe. He's so judgy! But, since your salvation might depend on it, you better get some great excuses ready to share on Judgment Day.
We get it. It's hard to read the divinely inspired word of the creator of the universe. He's so judgy! But, since your salvation might depend on it, you better get some great excuses ready to share on Judgment Day.
 
Show us a pulpit, and you've shown us everything we need to know about its pastor. In fact, our panel of theology experts on staff at The Babylon Bee have the God-given ability to judge with 99.97% accuracy the theology of a church just based on its pulpit.
Show us a pulpit, and you've shown us everything we need to know about its pastor. In fact, our panel of theology experts on staff at The Babylon Bee have the God-given ability to judge with 99.97% accuracy the theology of a church just based on its pulpit.
 
You can tell a lot about a person by which character they use in Super Smash Bros.
You can tell a lot about a person by which character they use in Super Smash Bros.
 
While exiled on the island of Patmos, the apostle John experienced a grand vision that would not be fully understood until Left Behind: A Novel of the Earth's Last Days was published in 1995.
While exiled on the island of Patmos, the apostle John experienced a grand vision that would not be fully understood until Left Behind: A Novel of the Earth's Last Days was published in 1995.
 
The world has been trying to rip off Christianity for thousands of years with wacky false idols and soap opera quality greek mythology. Frankly, it's embarrassing.
The world has been trying to rip off Christianity for thousands of years with wacky false idols and soap opera quality greek mythology. Frankly, it's embarrassing.
 
During a recent devotional time, Jesus found himself flummoxed when reading his words in the popular Bible “translation” which renders the text “thought-for-thought” rather than “word-for-word”—“The Message.”
During a recent devotional time, Jesus found himself flummoxed when reading his words in the popular Bible “translation” which renders the text “thought-for-thought” rather than “word-for-word”—“The Message.”
 
Enthralled onlookers at Lakewood Church in Houston watched this Sunday as a surprise guest marched onstage: John MacArthur.
Enthralled onlookers at Lakewood Church in Houston watched this Sunday as a surprise guest marched onstage: John MacArthur.
 
Mrs. Dorothy Marie Bennett Bonner, age 91, a resident of Edward, NC died Friday June 21, 2019 at Grantsbrook Nursing & Rehab Center of Grantsboro.
Mrs. Dorothy Marie Bennett Bonner, age 91, a resident of Edward, NC died Friday June 21, 2019 at Grantsbrook Nursing & Rehab Center of Grantsboro.
 
Here is the "New Baptist Look." His father was at the Taylors (SC) FBC when I started at Easley in 1970.
Here is the "New Baptist Look." His father was at the Taylors (SC) FBC when I started at Easley in 1970.
 
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